The gossiping black widow...

So, I find it interesting that people can be so rude, disrespectful and judge others and then, not even a year later, do the same thing that they were judging others about. What's up with that? See, there are two women that I used to see all the time. I will call them "gossip one" and "gossip two." They decided to talk amongst themselves and come to a conclusion about me and my family. Then, gossip one decided to tell someone in my ward! Fortunately, she is not a "gossip three" and it ended there. However, it could have blown up in my face. It could have caused a lot of damage to my family. And, these "gossip-ers" don't even give a crap! They just continue living their gossipy lives and never once have they apologized. Gossip two is so fake - she has everyone thinking she is so sweet and innocent. Not only that, when I run into them occasionally (gossip two moved and the other is moving soon!) they pretend that nothing is wrong - they pretend they did nothing wrong. Now, I heard a bit of gossip about gossip one and thought to myself, "I could embellish here and I would probably be right and I could blab to a bunch of people, but I won't because it would be terrible if it ended up untrue." So, I didn't. And then the next week, it was true. I hadn't blabbed or gossiped or anything. Why? Because it was rude and she did it to me and two wrongs don't make a right! So, now I find it interesting that gossip one has done what she has done. For someone that was very intolerant of me and my decisions just one year ago, is doing the exact same thing! Not only that, this is her 3rd time! It was only my first. Where's the empathy? She was so hard on me, especially for someone who had to be contemplating doing the exact same thing. Then, I got to thinking, maybe she wasn't contemplating. Maybe she just decided to do this recently when circumstances changed. She tends to spend all their money and then spit them out. She must be moving on to her next victim. How can people stoop that low? Geez! And, that is why I shall change her name from gossip one to the gossiping black widow! Unbelievable!

You probably don't understand all that gobbledygook that I just wrote, but that's okay. I am a little confused myself. I just had to get it off my chest! I feel better now!

Ouch!

So, I played volleyball with the ladies. It was the right thing to do, or so I thought. You know, stay home and watch nighttime drama or play church ball? Anyhoo, I played church ball. Had fun until the ball bounced off another girl and came at me with such force (and for some reason I was not under the ball which was my intention) and BAM! Jammed my ring finger on my left hand. It hurt so bad. I was trying not to cry, but I wanted to. Last night, I was convinced I would have to have it reduced by the doctor today. That thing wouldn't straighten or bend for anything. Plus, it hurt like nobodies business. I religiously did the RICE treatment including letting my arm sleep on three pillows and then by morning it was much more straight. So, what the heck? I could have stayed home in jammies, eating popcorn, losing myself in Seattle Grace hoping for some fresh new sexy Mcdoctor to come work there, but instead I went to support the church ball. Where's my blessings??? And now this post is taking me forever to type! So, it's all good for now, although I don't think I can play volleyball for a while! I guess that means watching t.v. IS the right thing to do!

T.V. is back!!!

The Fall t.v lineup is back this week. Which means that Gray's is back and I am soooooo happy for tonight. Also, can't wait for the Office premiere. I'm supposed to play volleyball with the ladies, but I am sort of tempted to skip it for t.v. It's a good thing we have DVR. I HEART DVR!!!

Yes...after kids go to bed, the DVR is my life. I have no life! Don't judge me!

Okay Summer, I lose!

I couldn't figure it out. But, I now know that it is from Back to the Future. Duh! Here's one for you: "I'm off like a dirty shirt" Let's see what you can do..."smarty pants movie quoter."

This one is important, urgent and very unsettling!!!

When I finished Legal Assisting school, I wanted to go on and complete a bachelor's degree. Because I went to a small college and graduated with a non-transferable degree, I didn't have many options. I headed in the direction of Criminal Justice through Weber State because it was my only time/money saving option. I did this until the third trimester of my pregnancy with Mikaela and had to drop out. I was working full-time supporting Don's undergrad, pregnant, a den leader and going to school at nights. Something had to give. It was the scouts and eventually the schooling. I don't regret it, because I have three wonderful children whom I have raised (as opposed to daycare) because of that decision. I attempted to go back when Hudson was a newborn, but Don lived away at externships and I was playing single mom to two. I packed my breast pump and headed to school at nights. As you can imagine, it didn't last. Some can handle it, I could not! I dropped out. Now, I find myself having to face that decision again. I find myself without my degree, without a job, without enough money and without a home of my own. I have been working hard to decide my next step. I talked to the counselors and discovered my best option was to go back to Criminal Justice and get my bachelors. I was unhappy about this and sort of wanted out of law/crime. As I have been pondering what to do, I decided that maybe I am to finish in Criminal Justice. Things have changed since I started this 12 years ago. The internet was just a small part of society back then. Now, it has become a wonderful tool for everyone as well as an evil avenue for sick and shocking crimes! I think I have discovered my future. I am 95% sure I am finishing my bachelors in Criminal Justice and may possibly work in the internet safety field. (Not looking at the crap. I can't do that.) Anyway, on to my post.

Over the weekend I watched the Oprah episode that I had missed a few weeks ago. Some of you may have seen it, others may have heard about it. It was extremely disturbing and awful. It truly changed who I am. Those of you that have thought about the issue of child pornography have probably only imagined how awful it can be. I know that it is worse than any of us can really imagine. After hearing what little they told us on the Oprah show (and it was by far ENOUGH) I knew that this was more disgusting and appalling than I could ever imagine! I don't think there is a person out there that watched that show without feeling horror and deep sadness. I gasped, held my hands over my mouth and cried when I heard what I heard. Two other people I know couldn't watch it and walked away. So, without explaining in details, please trust me that this issue is worse than you know. Think of how you view this issue and then add 100 times the disgust, filth, and sorrow and you will have it. These children have no voice in this issue. The victims are getting younger and younger and the crimes against them are getting more and more horrific. A bipartisan bill is up for senate vote on the 27th of this month which is in just a few days. Please go to this website and get the sample letter and information you need to write or call your senators. This matter is urgent!!! Please do it today!!!

http://www.oprah.com/article/oprahshow/20080911_tows_predators

Those of you with blogs, especially well viewed blogs, please let people know about this via your blog. Also, for those of you in Utah, there is an offenders website where you can check out your neighborhood for offenders. It's a good website and it's good to know who to watch out for. Keep in mind that this is just the offenders we know about. There are others in your neighborhoods we don't know about. Here are the sites for the Utah and the National registry as well.
Utah registry: http://corrections.utah.gov/asp-bin/sonar.asp?m=1
National registry: http://www.familywatchdog.us/

High Council Stripper?!?

I went to the "noisy ward" today. It was High Council sunday. The speaker was speaking and then suddenly tells us that it is really hot in the chapel. He asks if he can take off his jacket. He continues with his talk and then asks if he can loosen his tie as he is still hot. By this time, we are looking at each other thinking "this is weird, right?" I was secretly thinking that he must be having a heart attack which would be the only sane reason to explain his inappropriate sweating and following strip tease. But, alas, it was no heart attack and was actually a part of the talk. Weird! So weird that I can't recall how it related to the talk.

The "noisy ward" refers to my surrogate ward. Since Don decided to stay in the ward, we agreed to rotate wards. The kids stay put and the parents rotate. Weird! I know, but nothing in my life is normal so why should this be! So, when one of us has the kids, they attend the ward that week. The other person has to find elsewhere to go. I have a surrogate ward that I attend and it's noisier than H.E. "doublehockeysticks"

Help!!!

Mikaela made it past the teachers review and the interview for student body officer at her school. They will choose 4 out of 10 kids. So, the competition is stiff. We now have the weekend to make a video and posters. Yikes! We need a theme and some creative ideas. Are there any blogging friends or blogging strangers that have any great ideas? This is the time for all you stalkers and lurkers out there to give me some of your creative juices. I promise I won't freak out. Unless, of course, you are a physchopath! I always freak on psychopaths. We can always use the last name somehow. Thanks a bunch guys.

It's recorder time!!!

Hudson is in 4th grade now and you know what that means??? Recorder time. Last night he played an awesome rendition of "Hot Cross Buns." (Did you just sing it?)

Nice!!!

Summer...I so took your challenge!

The answer is: Staying Alive!

Finola Hughes character says it to John Travolta's character. I cannot, for the life of me, find a clip for it though. Dang it! I only get half the points. I immediately knew the answer, but it took me longer to find a clip. I guess you can't find everything on youtube! Do it again!!!

It's not a tumor...

Dalton lost his front tooth!

He came home from school on Thursday with a missing front tooth! It has been super wiggly and I kept telling him to hold out on losing it until after all our pictures (school and family). So, you will notice that our family pics have both his front teeth. I wanted one last picture of him with baby teeth! I really thought I might have a kid that would finally have his missing two front teeth for Christmas but, now I'm not so sure. That new tooth is coming in like gangbusters. This whole losing his two front teeth thing has been hard for me. The others weren't as hard and I think it's because he is my baby. I tend to think of him as my baby and sometimes treat him as such. Not like I feed him bottles or baby food or weirdo stuff like that. I mean I don't realize how old he really is. I hear him say things and think, this kid is so smart. Then, I realize he is suppose to think and say things like that. Like today I really realized that he is six! A first grader! When Mikaela was this age, I thought she was much older than I think Dalton is. It's not because he is more immature or anything. It's me and my thinking. Maybe it was because I had a new baby and a toddler and she was such a big helper at six. Dalton hasn't had that kind of opportunity. Anyhoo, I can't really explain it, but those of you that know you have had your last baby, know what I am talking about.

So, Cham had a great idea to get a professional (and by professional we mean 3.99 from walmart) picture of them with their missing two front teeth. I sure wish I had thought to do that with the other two. That would have been so cute. So, hopefully I will do that and get it posted. We are still waiting for the second tooth to come out. I can wait a little longer than he can!

Pictures to follow soon. Have to run to Costco first. Stinkin computer.

A little clarification for my sake

Some random stranger made a comment to my last post, which is fine, but I thought I would clarify a few things. First of all, I do think of myself as a proactive parent. More proactive than most, less than some. Secondly, I like public school and would love to see it improve and get better. I think there are many great teachers out there. I volunteer my time and do as much as I feel I can do within my capabilities. I do feel that nothing will prepare a person for real life like public school. However, in some situations, kids are falling through the cracks no matter how hard you work at it or try. And sometimes too many choices can be a bad thing. Thirdly, it's not just a "charter school" that I want my children to get their education from. I did not mean to infer that I simply wanted any old "charter school." I know of one charter school where one of the teachers is not even an educator and a drug addict. Stability is super important to me and I don't think it's a good idea to take your kids out of school and put them in a charter school just because it is the rage. I think much research has to be done before doing that. I can't tell you how many people take their kids out of public school, put them in a charter, take them out of that one, put them back in public school, find another charter and put them there. That is ridiculous! So, my priorities on a new school are: 1) feel comfortable with everything about the school, 2) have many recommendations (from parents and students) about the school, 3) not have any bad things said about the school and 4) location, location, location. So, unless I have those priorities, I won't move my children. Stability counts for something in my book! And, let's face it, this is my book! Plus, I was just crabby last post!

It's that pity party funk again!

Okay, so I'm jealous!!! First of all, I am admitting that this is probably my biggest weakness and therefore most of my sinning revolves around this. I don't have the tempatation to do drugs or drink or party or steal or lie or any of that crap. I have the envious kind of crap. There, now that I've said it, I can move on.

Here's the story:
My children have a couple of great friends who started attending a local charter school. After years of watching them succeed and surpass my children in learning, I decided to apply. Now, everyone and their dog, literally has applied to this school. It's a really good school. So, last year I go with another mom and we tour the place and both put in our applications together. (That part is really pointless, but it adds to the pain.) I had also talked to my sister-in-law about this school and she researched it and applied as well. So, here we all are waiting for this school to draw our names (lottery of course, which I suck at, by the way.) The first year we put in our applications, my friend that I turned the application in with gets two of her three kids accepted. So, that means that her third child gets bumped up to a higher priority list to get in. I had pretty much accepted that this wasn't going to happen for us. So, this year comes around and just this week, my sister-in-law gets a call that her child has been accepted to this school. Now, I know that this has been a hard decision for my sister-in-law because her daughter has been in school since the end of July and has a wonderful teacher and has made lots of new friends. And, I am happy for this opportunity my niece has. The problem is that I am also jealous! Extremely jealous. I am the one that told my sister-in-law about the school. I am the one that helped talk the other mom into it. And, their kids get to reap the benefits while my kids are stuck with crap. It just doesn't seem fair. Now, obviously I recognize that it wasn't meant to be for my kids. I know that if it was, it would have happened but I can't help feeling sad for them. I think it sucks that they have to go through this life with divorced parents, without a home to call their own, with "you know what else I'm talking about..." and a subpar education. Now, why do I say subpar you ask? I say that only because I am sick of our school wasting time. I am sick of crappy teachers that you can't do anything about. (They aren't all crappy, I'm not saying that. But, we have had our share.) I am sick of kids being overlooked. I am sick of hearing that my child watched a 2 hour Disney movie during a regular school day. I am sick of the principal not doing anything she promises to do.
Most of all, I am sick of being jealous. Most of you that know me, know that I like to throw pity parties for myself. I am easily discouraged and feel defeated quickly. It's hard for me to go through life with a smile on my face always pretending that everything is okay when it really isn't! It's hard for me to think about the sacrifices that we've made as a family for a future that was never going to happen. It's just hard for me to be positive.

So, now that I have let it all out, maybe I can move on. I know what I need to do to get past this. I just need to do it. Gratitude always helps me get out of my pity party funk so I will leave you with a quote on gratitude that I'm sure was written just for me!

"Gratitude expressed to our Heavenly Father in prayer for what we have brings a calming peace—a peace which allows us to not canker our souls for what we don’t have. Gratitude brings a peace that helps us overcome the pain of adversity and failure. Gratitude on a daily basis means we express appreciation for what we have now without qualification for what we had in the past or desire in the future. A recognition of and appreciation for our gifts and talents which have been given also allows us to acknowledge the need for help and assistance from the gifts and talents possessed by others."
--Robert D. Hales, "Gratitude for the Goodness of God", Ensign, May 1992, 63

Last night...

Mikaela asked me what a condom was!!! Ahhh, middle school! It's actually a pretty funny story. I have to say that while it caught me off guard, I was secretly happy she came to me. I'm glad she feels comfortable enough asking and she knew a little about what it was so she totally knew what she was getting into when she asked. It's not like she thought it was a computer program or anything else. She knew it had to do with...well, you know. And now, she knows exactly what it is and probably knows more than the kids who mentioned it in the first place. It's funny how kids only know bits and pieces of these things. None of them can explain it to the other in details, so the message is for kids to go ask their parents! And parents, please explain this stuff to your children. I have a friend with two boys and she told me about one of her son's friends who got caught shoplifting condoms. He was doing it because he was curious and wanted to see what they were. So, I made sure to tell her if she ever wanted to see one, I would show her. She's not interested right now. Phew! And, since we are on the subject, I will put in my two cents about my sex ed research. I found a book I really liked and used it with Mikaela. It's called "How to Talk to Your Child About Sex." Within that book, they recommended the children's book "Where Did I Come From?" I have since heard of another that I would like to read but haven't done so yet. It's called "What's Love Got to do With It?" The idea is that this is ongoing conversation and not just "the talk" but I have not been good about that. So, this was a chance to remind her of some of the things we talked about. What are your thoughts, advice and experiences on this subject? I would love to know what has or has not worked for any of you.

Picture time

We took some family pictures tonight and it was awesome! We were trying to catch the last bit of summer. It was a beautiful night in a beautiful park. The only drawback were the HUGE mosquitos that decided to munch on us as the sun went down. Luckily, we didn't get too many bites. So a big thank you to Michelle for taking our photos. She did a great job and was so great with the kids. She is so cute and patient and my kids loved her! She sent me a few teasers tonight and I am in love. They turned out super cute! I will post more as I get them and some of them may just have to be saved for the Christmas card.

I've decided...

that I need more friends to do stuff with. I'm bored and lonely. Oh, and don't forget...pathetic! :-(